I am going to be intentionally vague about details and I changed some names, in order to protect the guilty.
I went to a networking event this evening. It was a great event. My litmus test is, "Are people friendly? Do they want to talk to people?" This event passed with flying colors. It's unfortunate that I can't say who put it on, because they did a nice job.
There's usually a few sponsors of these types of events. They usually do it to market their business. The hosts of the event were awesome. They had a nice storefront. They provide services and products to homeowners and contractors to improve their kitchens. Beautiful stuff. The first person I met was a guy responsible for business development. One of the friendliest guys I've met in a while. A genuinely nice guy. Interested in people. Interested in learning. The kind of guy I like to do business with. Kind of guy I'd hang out with.
I do business with a handful of contractors. Most contractors, as Mark'll tell you are jackasses. My father is a contractor. My uncle is too. My uncle and dad aren't jackasses. But, I know a few that are. My clients aren't. There's two general contractors, Mark and Goodfellas. There's a landcape contractor. And there's an electrical contractor. These are all guys that do the right thing for their clients. Quality is number 1. And Service comes first.
However, most contractors aren't like this. They are unreliable, unprofessional, cocky, unorganized, etc. So, tonight when I found out that the co-sponsor "helped contractors improve their business", I thought, "that's a much needed service. I need to talk to that guy." So, I asked the producer of the event what his name was. And I went to say hi.
The conversation went something like this:
Me: "Hi Joe, What you do is very interesting niche. It's a much needed service."
Joe: "Yeah."
Me: Well thank you for sponsoring tonight. I appreciate it.
Pause.
Me: So, you work with the "Company X". What do you do for your clients?
Joe: We work with clients on Sales and Marketing, Finance, Operations.
Me: Interesting. I have a handful of clients that are contractors. I know from working with them that there are a lot of challenges and that most contractors aren't very good at those things.
Joe: Grunt. Yeah.
[All the while, Joe was leaning on a countertop facing 90 degrees from me, with his hands folded not looking at me and mostly disinterested in what I had to say.]
Me: When I heard you speak, I was saying "I need to talk to that guy." I have an opportunity that might interest you. Now's not the time to talk about it. Do you have a card? I'll give you a call?"
[Joe Pulls out a card. Still mostly disinterested. Gives me a card.]
Me: It doesn't seem like you are interested in talking, Joe. Are you all set? Are you not interested in growing your business?
Joe: No. It's your approach. I don't like you're approach. When I come to these things, it's mostly just to meet people and socialize.
Me: So, what is it that I said, that you didn't like?
Joe: You asked, "You're not interested in growing your business?" Who says no to that?
Me: Good point. However, you're not looking at me. You have your hands accross your chest. I do business with a handful of contractors as well as the BBB. You wouldn't be interested in getting introduced to them? There's no value that the BBB could provide to you or your clients?
Joe: No. I have a handful of clients that were members. They didn't get anything out of it.
Me: Ok, Joe. It doesn't sound like you're interested in talking. Here's your card back.
[I walk away.]
I don't know why these kinds of encounters bother me? They are very rare. I had 3 clients in the room. There were another 10 people I know who know me. Mutual trust and respect exists. And I met another 10 people that I'd like to speak with further. I go to these things to grow my own business. But, I end up making more connections for other people than myself.
I end up having conversations with people and pointing them in the right direction afterwards. Or I introduce people at the event who do business later. I do it, as Jeetu says because "I like to help people." For example, I met a guy the other day. He's a custom woodworker. He's just coming back from active duty. He's got a family he needs to support. He wants to have his own business, instead of working for someone else. His passion is making his own products. But, he's doing custom woodworking in order to make a living. I knew he wouldn't be a customer. He's not ready to market himself. He may never be. But, I spent a half hour on the phone getting to know him and his challenges. I found out what kind of work he's done in the past and then I connected him with people that might need that kind of work.
Why? I do this because it comes back around. And it feels good. I've connected people with jobs, with business partners, with clients, etc. It's what I like to do. It's what we've built a business around. People are my passion. Helping them is what I enjoy. And there are plenty of people that have helped me along the way. There are plenty of people that still do. They do it for their own reasons. But, they mostly do it because they care.
So, it really bothers me when an encounter like tonight happens. Should I have done or said something different? Should I have approached it differently? Or is this guy just a close-minded asshole? I guess I won't ever know. But, I guess it also shouldn't matter. I can't help people that aren't interested in help.
But, it makes me think. Are you open to different approaches? I could have done it differently. But, he was actually in control. I put myself out there. I made myself vulnerable. I offered to help. He's the one that wasn't open to it. Even if I was slightly smelly with pimples on my face, unironed shirt and a slight beer breathe, how does he know that I am not the next Bill Gates, Toll Brothers, Mahatma Ghandi, or the link to his future Million dollar client? Maybe he shouldn't interpret me as being a pushy salesguy with an aggressive approach. Maybe I'm just a friendly outgoing guy who wants to help? I guess he'll never know. It's his loss.
And now that I've written a few hundred words on it, I can move on. But, the question I have is... Are you open to different approaches? If not, how does it hinder your success?
You never know who can help you. And if you aren't willing to give people an opportunity to prove their value, you'll have a lot less opportunities to prove yours.
Oh boy. I can comment!
Pete, It's not altruism, it's more being one with the world. You realize that what helps the world, helps you and vice versa. I have been guilty of judging these closed minded people in the past. Someone pointed out that they're just different, doing it their way. So, we shouldn't judge. It shouldn't bother us. We don't have to do it their way and isn't that a good thing.
Good job.
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